Respect Authority

Yahoo! Answers continues to grow as the world’s liveliest community of the dumbest human kind has to offer. Yes, it’s even beating Twitter.

Ironically, the original poster of the question just unknowingly took the “How Can I Test If I’m A Fucking Idiot?” Test. Congratulations, you passed with flying colors, World’s Greatest Dad.

It was my intention to avoid the Miss California USA mudslinging, as making fun of the retarded is all too easy and I’m not feeling nearly bad enough about myself to justify it. However, the woman knows no bounds. She has thrown my mercy in my face, rubbing it in with her incredibly fake boobies.

Apparently a coup is in order and Miss California is about to be dethroned. Semi-nude photos have been circulating, as I’m sure your hard drive can attest to, which is a breach of contract in the Miss USA alternate universe. Word is still out on why being topless, covering your breasts with your arm, while your back is to the camera is any more scandalous than wearing a micro bikini on stage for old gay men to judge, or for that matter, getting those judges to pay for new silicon melons.

Despite the fact that the photos were probably released by Miss California herself (which would be a genius move if she wasn’t just copying Vanessa Williams, or you know, if she was actually capable of doing anything even remotely related to genius) she’s doing a nice job of pretending to be upset about it. Just like she pretends that her dad isn’t gay. Or that her entire wholesome, opposite-marriage-supporting family isn’t homophobic white trash who spends their weekends relentlessly calling each other gay.

Carrie Prejean, the soon to be softcore porn model, insists, “These attacks on me and others who speak in defense of traditional marriage are intolerant and offensive. While we may not agree on every issue, we should show respect for others’ opinions and not try to silence them through vicious and mean-spirited attacks.”

Yes, let’s not silence them through vicious attacks like, oh I don’t know, barring them from rights afforded to every one else in the country? That would be pretty mean-spirited. Read More ›

Hate Mongrel Jr: God may hate fags, but bumboclot, he sure loves reggae!

It’s incredibly rare, if you’re sane that is, to see a Westboro Baptist Church protest and smile. The man above is my hero of the day, injecting humor into a humorless vacuum of hate, showing just how pathetic and disgusting the WBC is (as if cajoling toddlers to hold up hideous signs, ensuring that future generations will be just as abysmally and offensively stupid as this one, wasn’t doing that already). Now, if I were to hold a counter protest to their picketing, I probably wouldn’t use a funny sign, but a baseball bat pumped full of nails… but to each their own. Read More ›

Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) Smoking a Nice Fat Dic-gar

America’s only gay (sorry Tammy, lesbians don’t count) representative, Barney Frank, is being blamed for the never ending death spiral of Freedom’s economy. What’s his crime you ask? Sleeping with a former executive of Fannie Mae, for thirteen years… ten years ago.

Granted its far from fact that lax minority lending during the Clinton Administration lead to this crisis, but still some find it queer that the man in charge of leading the House out of financial armageddon was pole-diving on the enemy a decade ago. A “top” GOP aide laments:

“C’mon, he writes housing and banking laws and his boyfriend is a top exec at a firm that stands to gain from those laws?

Listen, I don’t care if Barney Frank and his former boyfriend (Herb Moses) had a secret-gay-fetish for exploiting subprime minority borrowers in the 1990s. All I care about is this bill and this picture. ‘Nuff said.

[Fox News]