Respect Authority

Sometimes local news promos make me kind of maybe want to watch local news. The fact that I caught this during what appears to be a reptilian grimace on the part of Michelle Trachtenberg, well, that’s just coincidence.

Also, Gossip Girl: Incredibly appropriate time to show this headline.

In sitting down to watch the premier episode of NYC Prep, I thought to myself that the success of this show will really depend on one thing: how well it manages to fulfill the “real-life Gossip Girl” prophecy. Will it add a spark of awkward melodrama to an otherwise timeless “hate the rich” plot line? Or will it inadvertently highlight the very reason we stoop the level of Gossip Girl to begin with — because it’s sensational,everyone is glamorous, even the nerdy guys are good-looking, and no one has bad skin.

Initially, the former seems to be the case. The characters are the same stereotypes, the drama is the same drama — the first episode features an argument over the worthiness of a certain charity, much like GG’s Blair was lambasted for her peregrine falcons fundraiser. Basically, NYC Prep is Gossip Girl, except everyone’s just six inches shorter and has mediocre hair. PC, who will clearly take the role of leading douchebag, is a dead ringer for GG’s Chuck Bass — in truth, he’d probably do a better job of playing the part than the current actor, who reminds me a lot of Chris Klein, circa American Pie–awkward, annoying and with a questionable hairline. PC clearly thinks himself above not only everyone on the show, but the show itself, in the sense that he less than subtly uses it as a platform for making the kind grandiose statements douchebags make; things like “Everything in New York City is about pulling connections. It’s all about who you know and how much money you have. And It’s really sad, and I’m not saying I’m like that, but that’s what New York is.” Thank you PC, let me know when you get your degree in urban anthropology.

Outside of PC, there are few characters that manage to make it non-awkward to be watching actual high school students go about their daily lives. (Seriously, think about it, it’s creepy). Jessie, long-time friend and ex-girlfriend of PC’s who’s still in denial about what league they’ve both grown into appearance-wise, is the kind of girl who never got the guy in high school, but twenty years later will probably be married to a real estate developer and own two companies. Sixteen-year-old Kelli is one of the easily confusable brunettes, memorable only because she lives alone with her 18-year-old brother while her parents shack up in the Hamptons six days a week. Sebastian is the “player,” except he’s a teenager so watching him hit on girls is like watching a baby learning to walk. Camille is the Type A academic one, who indulges in the dramatics, but never at the expense of her “plan” (Harvard, husband by 40, the works). In normal high school, though, I’m pretty sure she’d be “that girl who really likes horses.” Taylor, another brunette, is the only public school character — a veritable pauper by Prep standards: her mom is exceedingly mom-like, and her first-episode party had fewer than one million guests. She’ll probably be the redeeming one until one of those private school sluts gets her drunk and uploads a YouTube video of her peeing in public. Read More ›