Respect Authority

I hate to do one obesity-related post so soon after another — seriously, I do think about other things, like drugs and sex and such — but this weekend’s New York Times Magazine was “the food issue,” and so I’ve just spent the better part of a morning/mid-afternoon reading one article after another on what works and what doesn’t when it comes to regulating our food intake, or asking professional scientists to regulate it for us. All in all, I discovered little by way of new information: It would seem that consuming fewer calories than we burn continues to be the most successful method of losing weight. Shocker.

But one good thing did come of those 25,000+ words. This. The “Double Down” sandwich from KFC, currently being tested in Rhode Island and Nebraska, ostensibly because neither state is known for being particularly obese, or known, period. (If a tree falls in Nebraska, and so on).

This newest “sandwich” from KFC, which isn’t featured anywhere on the chain’s actual Web site (for obvious public-relations-nightmare-waiting-to-happen reasons), is bacon and cheese and sauce slapped between not bread, or meat-infused-bread, but rather bread-infused meat — i.e. two breaded chicken patties. I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.

I really wish this was a hoax. Video here. Also, here’s a poor-quality commercial, (with the much-needed explanation: “We just didn’t have room for a bun”).

KFC has quite obviously taken a page out of the SNL book. Check it out:

P.S. After the fact, Aaron and I thought perhaps RA should contribute its own list of potential fat-food combinations. Consider these motherfuckers copyrighted. I’m talking to you, Popeyes.

1. Turducken Taco, with fire sauce

2. Bacon Double Jamaican Meat Patty

3. Pizza-Stuffed Pizza (Also available: Stuffed Crust Pizza-Stuffed Pizza)

4. Bagel-Dog Enchiladas with Nacho Cheese and Chili

5. Deep-Fried Sloppy Joes