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Archive for March 2010

Two For the Price of One

Filed Under: TV

Anyone who’s been in a corporate meeting …or at least seen an episode of 30 Rock, knows the importance of synergy. After all, what’s better than a great product if not finding a way to integrate it with other great products in the most prevalent business example of killing two birds with one money-scented stone? This sort of big-business sell-outitude is obvious in things like Taco Bell/Pizza Hut combo restaurants and ABC’s prolonged dispute with Cablevision eliminating my access to Disney for an entire day. But in the TV world, synergy has been woefully underutilized. In other words, the day there’s more than one competition show about hair styling is the day we should start trimming the fat—and what better way than by combining some of our favorite programs? Here are RA’s top ideas for the TV equivalent of Taco Bell/Pizza Hut …minus the gas.


rwjackass1. REAL WORLD/JACKASS

Both of these stalwart MTV franchises have been lagging in recent years—on the Real World, MTV vacillates between self-involved intellectual types and balls-to-the-wall party kids, with little gray area. Meanwhile Jackass, once the symbol of our viral video times, has since the beginning of the decade fallen into a murky audience zone. The 20-somethings who followed the show during its heyday are too old to appreciate it anymore, and there’s something inherently creepy about 13-year-olds watching men their father’s age attach things to their balls.

Combo show: Eight strangers picked to live in a house and have their various attempts to injure themselves or one-another taped.


survivorlost2. SURVIVOR/LOST

The “plot” of Survivor is ungodly easy to follow—drop desperate losers off on an island and let them duke it out; each week, someone is given the boot. Lost, by contrast, has long since stopped making sense for even its most devoted followers. Throwing these two together would make Survivor fans moderately smarter (as Lost is prone to obscure literary and philosophical references), and Lost fans slightly less confused. After all, what is an island full of fame-seeking morons if not some sort of televised purgatory?

Combo show: Send a few dozen idiots to an obscure island with limited supplies and plentiful mysteries. Stage random assaults via wild animals and smoke monsters. Each week, someone gets kicked off (and put on a plane that will subsequently crash).


housewivesapprentice3. REAL HOUSEWIVES/CELEBRITY APPRENTICE

Anyone who’s seen even one episode in the Real Housewives franchise knows housewife in this case is synonymous with “marrying rich so you can start your own line of face cream/cocktails/jewelry/insert other pointless product here.” But what would happen if you actually put the self-absorbed and mildly insane women of RHNY to work for someone like The Donald? Though Sinbad and Bret Michaels have provided no shortage of hilarity so far on this season of Celebrity Apprentice (to say nothing of perennial politician Rod Blagojevich), the two-hour show is quickly wearing thin (at Episode 2, mind you). Some good old-fashioned cat fights would definitely do the trick.

Combo show: Pit two teams of Real Housewives ladies (personally, I vote for New York vs. New Jersey) against one-another in a series of challenges aimed at “raising money for charity” (by which I mean degrading people who think they’re above menial labor).

 
kira

12:50 PM on March 24th, 2010 | 

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Yeah, I Totes Get the Best Swag

Filed Under: Art

lawhat-450x337

 
kira

1:57 PM on March 17th, 2010 | 

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Trannies and incest and meth, oh my!

Filed Under: Uncategorized

mattmc-450x337In honor of today, March 3, 2010, otherwise known as the day Nip/Tuck died, I’ve pasted below, in its (almost) entirety, the whole of N/T character Matt McNamara’s Wikipedia page. I’ll be the first to admit that the last two seasons of the show have been rather lackluster, though I feel this was to be expected from a program that in Season 1 brought up drug cartels and self-circumcision, obese people stuck to their couches and wanton disregard for safe sex. Either way, it’s recaps like this that remind us why we all started watching, and just couldn’t bring ourselves to stop.

Farewell Nip/Tuck; I’ll miss you.

Matt McNamara
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Matthew McNamara

First appearance: Pilot (episode 1.01)
Created by: Ryan Murphy
Portrayed by: John Hensley
INFORMATION:

Aliases: Matt, Matty
Gender: Male
Age: approx. 22
Occupation: Student, Mime, Armed Robber
Family: Unnamed rapist (biological paternal grandfather)
Spouse(s): Kimber Henry (ex-wife)
Children: Jenna McNamara (daughter, with Kimber)
Relatives:

Christian Troy (biological father)
Julia McNamara (mother)
Sean McNamara (legal father)
Emme Lowell (paternal half-sister)
Annie McNamara (maternal half-sister)
Conor McNamara (maternal half-brother)
Gail Pollack (biological paternal grandmother)
Erica Noughton(maternal grandmother)
Thomas McNamara (paternal grandfather)
Colleen McNamara (paternal grandmother)
Max Pollack (biological paternal half-uncle; same age as Matt)
Sarah Pollack (biological paternal half-aunt)
Kimber Henry Troy (step-mother)
Matthew “Matt” McNamara is a fictional character on the American television series Nip/Tuck, portrayed by John Hensley.

Matthew “Matt” McNamara, was raised as the son of Julia and Sean McNamara, although his biological father is Christian Troy, a man he regards as an uncle. Matt has two half-sisters, Annie (whose father is Sean and mother is Julia) and Emme Lowell (daughter of Christian with a woman named Darlene Lowell) and a younger half-brother, Conor (son of Sean and Julia). He is approximately 16 years of age at the beginning of the show’s first season. Although he isn’t as much as a ruffian in the beginning, it is implied that he was a delinquent in his early years, as Sean says to Christian, “I spent 17 years trying to corral your bad genetics”. Read More ›

 
kira

10:09 AM on March 3rd, 2010 | 

Posted by kira

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