Respect Authority

Colin Powell has officially endorsed Barack Obama. Before you scoff and head back to your Palin rally, Colin Powell wants you to know he’s come to this decision after months of carefully following the race and not because of race. Remember, rednecks (our most precious and faithful readers, obvi), blacks don’t automatically support each other. Alan Keys has yet to endorse Obama, or any black. In fact Alan Keys may not know he’s black.

Anyway, what’s really interesting about his endorsement is the character of the figure and the rational behind his support. Powell is a highly respected and decorated military leader, he’s been a key figure in the Bush family’s international military outings… which on second thought might not be such a good thing. Forgetting his job performance for a second, he also happens to be a loyal Republican who has been on the fence this entire election season and has finally made up his mind thanks to McCain’s erratic negativity.

Powell said:

We have two wars. We have economic problems. We have health problems. We have education problems. We have infrastructure problems. We have problems around the world with our allies. So those are the problems the American people wanted to hear about, not about Mr. Ayers, not about who’s a Muslim or who’s not a Muslim.

This line of reasoning is exactly what the Obama campaign hopes independent voters follow. Powell adds:

And this business, for example, of the congressman from Minnesota who’s going around saying, “Let’s examine all congressmen to see who is pro-America or not pro-America” — we have got to stop this kind of nonsense, pull ourselves together and remember that our great strength is in our unity and in our diversity. And so, that really was driving me.

The congress “man” he’s talking about is Rep. Michele Bachmann; who has steadily lost her mind over the course of the last few months. Bachmann, who’s up for reelection this November, is now being targeted by internet trolls. They’re throwing fistfuls of money at her unsuspecting opponent to try and get her out of Congress.

Powell further endorses Obama’s socialist policies, saying:

Taxes are always a redistribution of money. Most of the taxes that are redistributed go back to those who paid them, in roads and airports and hospitals and schools. And taxes are necessary for the common good. And there is nothing wrong with examining what our tax structure is or who should be paying more, who should be paying less. And for us to say that that makes you a socialist, I think is an unfortunate characterization that isn’t accurate.

I don’t want my taxes raised. I don’t want anybody else’s taxes raised. But I also want to see our infrastructure fixed. I don’t want to have a $12 trillion national debt, and I don’t want to see an annual deficit that’s over $500 billion heading toward a trillion. So, how do we deal with all of this?

After Powell was finished with his unbalanced, inflammatory, anti-American attack on Joe the Plumber, the reporter asked, “Are you still a Republican?”

Powell responded, “Fuck you.”

Watch the full endorsement here.

[CNN]