Respect Authority

In the latest fun filled episode of Katie Couric Makes Sarah Palin Look So Dumb Even I’d Be Feeling Bad If I Wasn’t So Fucking Terrified Of Her, Couric once again stumps everybody’s favorite mother of five with more killers like “What’s your favorite type of sandwich?” To her credit, Palin believed the “sandwiches” Couric was referring to were a type of WMD. Besides, people only eat raw moose in Alaska; everybody knows that. Unfair, Katie, come on!

Okay, that part was a lie, but the interview featured both Sarah Palin and Joe Biden, not in the same room, obvi, because they need to be alive for tonight’s debate, and when asked what other Supreme Court cases aside from Roe v. Wade she disagreed with, Palin seemed to get distracted by trying to remember how to construct complete sentences.

Palin: Well, let’s see. There’s, of course in the great history of America there have been rulings, that’s never going to be absolute consensus by every American. And there are those issues, again, like Roe v. Wade, where I believe are best held on a state level and addressed there. So you know, going through the history of America, there would be others but …

Couric: Can you think of any?

Palin: Well, I could think of, any again, that could be best dealt with on a more local level. Maybe I would take issue with. But, you know, as mayor, and then as governor and even as a vice president, if I’m so privileged to serve, wouldn’t be in a position of changing those things but in supporting the law of the land as it reads today.

First of all, and this is petty, but when am I not… “the law of the land”? I’m sorry, but what fucking year is this, Hezekiah? No, I’m afraid you cannot get elected into office just by speaking like the founding fathers, but thanks anyway.

Also interesting to note is Palin’s assertion that she “wouldn’t be in a position of changing those things.” To me, this clearly displays an insider’s knowledge that John McCain is, indeed, a machine, and will not be removed from his duties at any time aside from the occasional ten minute oil change. Truly, there is literally no other way she could assume she’d have no bearing on the overturning of court cases unless… she really doesn’t know what the Vice President is supposed to do… oh man.

[CBS News]