Respect Authority

John confused, gets lost. Bamalama is hovering at 50% and in some polls is above the mark (which hasn’t been done by a Democrat since like 1984). Blah blah blah. Who gives a shit anymore?

Moving on… to BLOOMBERG ’09!

Every eight years, New York plays host to a global catastrophe that reshapes worldwide policy in its wake; leaving us with a heap of rubble and an air of panic in the downtown area.  

After 9/11, Giuliani was hailed by everybody as the savior of what was left of New York/the planet, and was even knighted by the Queen of England, his firm’s first security commission to protect Her Majesty from… from apparently fire breathing dragons — why the fuck do we knight anyone anymore?

What is it about international crises (incidentally occurring in New York) that riles contempt for term limits?  (It’s Luke Skywakeralsyes FTR).

But this time, Bloomberg’s delusion of grandeur (and belief in his own ability to save New York as we know it) may be fundamentally different.

First and foremost, Bloomberg has relevant experience that relates directly to the crisis at hand. In fact he probably started it. His business got its first break installing terminals at Merill Lynch; terminals it used to trade itself into oblivion for all we know.

Giuliani, however, wasn’t a firefighter and therefore had no further relevance to New York post 9/11.

Besides, Bloomberg leaves us alone. Sometimes I forget we have a mayor! The city works, people are generally happy. Whenever a cop accidentally sodomizes a minority, Bloomberg seems shocked and confused by the presence of cops on his company’s payroll, then remembers he’s mayor, gives a lil’ speech and goes back to his office. Race riots and civil unrest are avoided because, fuck, you don’t have race riots and civil unrest in a corporation, you just go home; Bloomberg doesn’t even believe they exist, so they just don’t happen.

Giuliani, on the other hand, was offended by poop on a canvas and called Bernie Kerik in to save the day.

The point is, being a captain’s flea on the Titanic gives you no more insight than seeing Russia from Alaska anymore than being borough president of Manhattan while it’s under siege by barbarians (on a plane or in suits) does.

What is true, however, is that Bloomberg is a great manager. While he can’t save us from an all out economic meltdown he definitely has a proven capacity to run this city.  Let him see it through to the end.